Shame

You may sit through all 101 minutes of “Shame”, but you won’t want to admit to it afterwards

It even failed on being creepy. Dude has a low level sex addiction, they keep showing that to you, some minor anger issues…. THE END. At least make it an INTERESTING guy with a sex addiction…. that has more sex….

Also, anyone that lives alone and still jerks off in the shower is seriously doing it wrong.

If you’re going to have an expensive manhattan loft all to yourself, and a sex addiction, cover that condo in flat panels LCDs and video projectors, splash quasi legal porn on every available surface, and jack off furiously while swinging upside-down in a set of gravity boots and cackling like a psychotic with a med reduction. 

GO BIG OR GO HOME 

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Trope de Elite (The Elite Squad)

was 114 minutes of the most fucked up, mentally deranged righteous badassery I’ve ever seen.  I can’t believe I hadn’t watched it sooner.  It’s joyously bleak, it makes Full Metal Jacket look like Rainbow Brite and the Star Stealer.

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SuckerPunch

Is truly amazing.  I don’t know how you manage to combine Japanese Demons, samurai swords, steampunk Nazi zombies, a legion of superhero girls in stripper outfits and schoolgirl uniforms, mechwarriors, and “Army of Me” by Bjork, and manage to make something boring, but they did it.  They REALLY did it.

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127 Hours…

…is actually an hour and 16 minutes of “When is he going to cut his arm off?”, 4 minutes of squinting and twitching, and 13 more of “Why the fuck am I still watching this?”.

It’s an interesting enough story, with about 66 minutes of contrived flashbacks, and unjustified hallucinatory eyecandy that it doesn’t need.  If you want to watch something about someone trapped, try ‘Buried’, or if you want to watch a good Danny Boyle film, ‘Trainspotting’.